An Invisible Enemy
- devabritow
- Jan 18
- 5 min read
I haven't read a book in its entirety since Michael A. Singer's The Untethered Soul, which I wrote about in Breakthrough, the penultimate post for 2025. Despite taking two books on holiday, my days and nights were so full that all I could manage to read was a few chapters of Angela Duckworth's Grit. While it's a good book, I haven't picked it up in two weeks (I will at some point, though). I then picked up Steven Bartlett's The Diary of a CEO as I headed to the beach one day and didn't open that one either. In what is now an obvious choice, I eventually opted for Ryan Holiday's The Obstacle Is The Way because I'd referenced his other book, The Daily Stoic, in last week's post and thought it might be a good segue. And, of course, it is. The book is about obstacles, and I'm trying to figure out what's holding me back from reading, something I ordinarily love to do. Something that forms the very basis of this self-help journey and this blog - again, both of which I love.
"Every obstacle is unique to each of us. But the responses they elicit are the same: Fear. Frustration. Anxiety. Confusion. Resentment. Depression. Anger. Despair. You know what you want to do but it feels like some invisible enemy has you boxed in, holding you down, holding you back."
The Obstacle Is The Way
Ryan Holiday’s book draws on Stoic philosophy (most notably the teachings of Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, and Seneca) to present a straightforward yet impactful idea: the obstacle itself becomes the path forward. Instead of resenting or shunning challenges, the book emphasises that obstacles—such as setbacks, failures, and challenges—serve as the foundation for growth, strength, and success. Structured around three Stoic disciplines (perception, action and will), The Obstacle Is the Way teaches that success comes not from avoiding difficulties, but from embracing them. With clear perception, consistent action, and strong willpower, every challenge turns into an opportunity to progress.
In terms of those three Stoic principles, they are:
Clear perception changes fear into focus and chaos into clarity
Obstacles require action, not complaints
Will changes pain into strength
But, What If I'm the Obstacle?
There's an invisible entity, not unlike the roommate Michael A. Singer writes about in The Untethered Soul, that resides somewhere inside me, and it places massive boulder-like obstacles in my path on a semi-regular basis. The metaphorical roommate is the voice in my head, the one responsible for the constant chatter that Ethan Kross wrote so expertly about in his similarly titled book. This invisible inner narrator judges, worries, comments, complains, plans and ruminates on the past, and we believe everything it says. But Singer had a specific reason for using the roommate as a metaphor.
"You try to get somewhere, but something invariably blocks the path, following and thwarting each move you make. You have just enough freedom to feel like you can move, just enough to feel like it's your fault when you can't seem to follow through or build momentum."
I am not the roommate. I am me. I am the one who hears the roommate, and when I notice their chatter, I become the observer. This is when I recognise that I am not my thoughts. They come unbidden, but I can stop them as they start. It is through observation that I can disidentify from my thoughts, which are just objects of awareness, not who I am. Any suffering I endure is due to believing what the roommate says, when all I need to do is listen, without reacting. The question is, does this exonerate me?
Of course not! There has to be someone responsible for my not reading a full book in almost a month, and it's me. I am my own obstacle. Stoicism suggests that, if I am the obstacle, then I have discovered the most significant obstacle of all. It's not a mountain, or any other external hurdle - it's me. But, if the Stoics are to be believed, I am the most workable obstacle of all. In his chapter titled, Recognize Your Power, Ryan Holiday includes the following quote by Epictetus:
"A podium and a prison is each a place, one high and the other low, but in either place your freedom of choice can be maintained if you so wish."
Epictetus's "prison" is my current slump, and I have the choice to pull myself out of it or continue to wallow in inaction. My 'roommate' might tell me to watch TV instead, or take a nap, or head to the mall, but I could just observe it and make a choice to the contrary. It's a process, though, an interesting one, and it's linked to the very same Stoic principles mentioned above. If I were talking to a Stoic now, they'd advise a change in perception to clear, honest observation without judgment. A Stoic understands that the obstacle is not me; it's the patterns of discomfort, fear, ego, set beliefs, overthinking, avoidance, and procrastination that have hindered me.
They suggest that the antidote to these ingrained patterns is small actions, even if they're uncomfortable. Speak up for yourself even when you'd rather keep the peace. Begin, even if you don't feel ready. Aim to finish something, without being bogged down with perfection. Stoicism has little time for motivation, encouraging reliance on effort and habit rather than on one's mood. Inner resistance isn't quashed by thought but by action.
Marcus Aurelius wrote that "The impediment to action advances action." As I continue on this self-help journey, it is likely that some of my inner obstacles will surface from time to time. Things like anxiety, doubt and some of those other patterns that have hindered me in the past, and that's okay. This is where will comes in. The Stoics believed in compatibilism, the idea that, even in a deterministic world, we have the freedom of thought and choice. Paradoxically, the Stoics advise us to accept who we are while working to change and improve - to act from a place of values rather than the perceived standpoints of negative thought patterns, no matter how perversely comforting they are.
My battlefield is internal, and it's ongoing. I win some, and I lose some. Each of these battles is an obstacle, and if the obstacle is the way, I am the way!
Random Quote
"Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What's important is the action. You don't have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually confidence will follow." (Carrie Fisher)
#anxiety #depression #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #selfcare #selfhelp #youarenotalone #thereisnostigma #wellness
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